My Cart, My Chaos
The other day, I was at the grocery store, balancing a pineapple, a bag of onions, and a gallon of milk precariously on top of a mountain of miscellaneous items in my cart. A fellow shopper gave me the side-eye. I knew that look. It was the “you’re doing it wrong” look, the “your chaotic cart offends my delicate grocery shopping sensibilities” look.
Listen, I get it. There are certain unspoken rules of grocery store etiquette. Rules like “thou shalt not block the aisle with thy cart” and “thou shalt not use the express lane with 20 items.” But sometimes, my friends, sometimes a rebel has to take a stand. Sometimes, a maverick must forge her own path, even if that path is littered with stray grapes and a dented can of beans.
The Express Lane Showdown: My Grocery Store Sins
One of the most sacred grocery store rules is the sanctity of the express lane. 12 items or less, they say. 15 max, if you’re feeling bold. Me? I laugh in the face of danger (and item limits). My motto? “12 items or less” is a suggestion, not a law.
I once went head-to-head with a particularly disgruntled woman over my overflowing basket in the express lane. She muttered about rules and glared daggers at my off-brand cereal choices. Did I back down? Did I cower in the face of her judgment? No, dear reader, I did not. I channeled my inner grocery store warrior and met her gaze with a smile. “Live a little,” I whispered, as I unloaded my 23 glorious items onto the conveyor belt.
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