Confessions of a Reformed Plant Killer (and Why You Should Totally Become a Plant Parent Too)

Confessions of a Reformed Plant Killer (And Why You Should Become a Plant Parent!)

From Black Thumb to Proud Plant Parent

Let’s be honest, my history with plants was more “funeral procession” than “flourishing jungle.” I’m talking crispy leaves, drooping stems, the whole tragic saga. If plants had obituaries, mine would’ve read “Died of Extreme Neglect” (ouch!). But then something changed. Maybe it was the pandemic, maybe it was a sudden surge of adulting, or maybe (just maybe) it was the irresistible charm of a particularly cute cactus named Spike. Whatever it was, I went from plant murderer to, dare I say it, a plant parent.

Plant Parenthood

Now, before you roll your eyes and mutter something about crazy plant ladies (no judgment, by the way), hear me out. Becoming a plant parent comes with some seriously awesome perks:

  1. Instant Mood Booster: There’s something inherently calming about being surrounded by greenery. It’s like bringing a little piece of nature indoors. Plus, have you ever looked at a plant you successfully kept alive? Instant pride.
  2. Air You Can Actually Breathe: Plants are like little air purifiers, filtering out toxins and releasing fresh oxygen. Who needs fancy air fresheners when you’ve got a peace lily working its magic?
  3. They Won’t Judge Your Dance Moves: Unlike your cat (who totally judges your dance moves), plants are the ultimate silent companions. They’ll never tell a soul about your off-key singing or your questionable interpretive dance routines.

Hilarious Plant Parent Mishaps (You’ll Relate!)

Okay, okay, so maybe it hasn’t been all sunshine and blooming roses. There were some…interesting moments along the way. Like the time I accidentally overwatered my succulent (RIP, Steve) or the time I mistook fertilizer for plant food (let’s just say my apartment smelled like a barnyard for a week). But you know what? Even the mishaps have been part of the fun. Because let’s be real, plant parenthood is all about learning as you go, embracing the imperfections, and celebrating the small victories (like when your plant finally sprouts a new leaf!).