Is My Houseplant Judging Me? A Deep Dive into the Mind of a Monstera



Is My Houseplant Judging Me? A Deep Dive into the Mind of a Monstera

The Side-Eye That Started It All

Let’s be honest, plant parents. We’ve all been there. You know, that moment when you catch your leafy roommate seemingly… judging you? For me, it started with a side-eye. A subtle tilt of my Monstera’s newest leaf, perfectly angled to witness my shame spiral after burning toast for the third time that week.

plant, Sarah,” I told myself, wiping burnt crumbs off my sweatpants (don’t judge, it was a Monday). But as the days went by, the evidence mounted. My once-innocent houseplant was morphing into a green-thumbed Gordon Ramsay, silently critiquing my every move.

Exhibit A: The Dramatic Droop

Remember that time I forgot to water my Monstera for, oh, just a week? Yeah, that happened. And did my plant simply wither gracefully? No, of course not. It unleashed the most dramatic wilt I’ve ever witnessed.

I’m talking full-on theatrics: leaves drooping like forgotten umbrellas, stems slumping over the pot like a teenager grounded on a Friday night. It was a performance worthy of an Oscar, complete with an unspoken message: “Seriously, Sarah? How hard is it to turn on a faucet?”