My Brown Thumb Chronicles Begin
Let’s be honest, I’m about as far from a green thumb as you can get. I’m the person who can kill a cactus by looking at it sideways. So, naturally, when the pandemic hit and everyone became obsessed with houseplants, I thought, “Why not give it another shot?”
I envisioned myself lounging in my plant-filled apartment, sipping tea surrounded by lush greenery. The reality, my friends, was far less glamorous.
My first victim? A seemingly innocent basil plant. How hard could it be, right? Just add water and sunshine, they said.
Oh, the naiveté!
I drowned it within a week. Then, in a desperate attempt to revive it, I forgot to water it for a month. My basil plant went to that great big garden in the sky, and I was left feeling like a plant-murdering monster.
But amidst the guilt and the scattered potting soil, something unexpected happened. I found myself strangely invested in keeping these little green things alive. It became a challenge, a puzzle to solve.
Thriving (Sort Of) in the Face of Adversity
Fast forward to today, and while my apartment may not resemble a jungle, I have managed to keep a few plants alive (keyword: few). My ZZ plant, which I’m convinced is made of plastic, is thriving despite my best efforts to neglect it. And my snake plant, bless its heart, seems to actually enjoy my inconsistent watering schedule.
I’ve learned a few things along the way, mostly through trial and error (lots of error).
- Overwatering is the kiss of death.
- Sunlight is crucial, unless it’s too much sunlight, in which case your plant will spontaneously combust.
- Talking to your plants may or may not help, but it’s certainly entertaining for the neighbors.