My Personal Elevator Everest: Conquering Awkwardness One Ride at a Time
We’ve all been there. Crammed into a metal box hurtling through the floors of an office building, desperately trying to avoid eye contact with strangers. The air is thick with unspoken rules – a silent contract of elevator etiquette we’re all expected to follow. And me? Well, let’s just say I’m the one who accidentally hits all the buttons while trying to find the “door open” button.
Rule number one of elevator etiquette: Thou shalt not touch the buttons unless absolutely necessary. Heaven forbid you accidentally graze the “close door” button while reaching for your floor. The collective gasp of horror from your fellow passengers would make you think you just announced your plans to start a mariachi band in the elevator.
Me? I’m a button-pushing rebel. I’ll hit that “door open” button with the enthusiasm of a game show host revealing a new car. Why? Because I believe in the power of a few extra seconds. Those precious moments could mean the difference between someone sprinting down the hallway, briefcase flapping, and making it onto the elevator (thanking their lucky stars for your button-pushing generosity), or resigning themselves to another three minutes of awkward silence.
Breaking the Silence: Navigating the Elevator Conversation Conundrum
Let’s talk about the elephant in the elevator: conversation. Or rather, the lack thereof. We’re all crammed together like sardines, yet we’re supposed to pretend we’re in our own little bubbles, completely oblivious to the presence of other human beings.
This, my friends, is where I excel at breaking the rules. Now, I’m not talking about launching into a twenty-minute monologue about my cat’s latest hairball incident. But a friendly “Good morning!” or a casual comment about the weather? That’s fair game. You never know, you might just brighten someone’s day. Or, you might get a terrified look and a hasty retreat into the corner. It’s a gamble I’m willing to take.