My Line-Standing Epiphany: A Comic-Con Cautionary Tale
It happened at a Comic-Con, a place where waiting in line is practically a competitive sport. I was young, naive, and desperately needed the bathroom right as the doors opened for a panel discussion I’d sold my soul (okay, maybe just a kidney) to attend.
That’s when it hit me: the unspoken, sacred rules of line-standing. See, I made the rookie mistake of just asking the person behind me to hold my spot. No explanation, no establishing a rapport – just a desperate plea. The look I received could have curdled milk. It was a mixture of suspicion, annoyance, and maybe even a touch of pity. Needless to say, I didn’t get my spot back, and I missed the panel’s opening minutes (the horror!).
But hey, every cloud has a silver lining, right? That experience sparked a lifelong fascination (obsession?) with the art of line-standing. Years later, I’m practically a black belt. So, without further ado, I present to you, dear reader, the unspoken rules of being a line-stander:
Rule #1: The Line is Law (Unless Food is Involved)
This is the cardinal rule. Once you’ve chosen your position, you are bound to it by an invisible, yet ironclad, contract. Leaving the line, even for a second, requires strategic planning and negotiation worthy of a hostage situation.
Exception: Food. Everyone understands the desperate need to refuel during a long wait. Just announce your intentions clearly and with a touch of desperation (“Be right back, my blood sugar is dangerously low!”). Bonus points for offering to bring back snacks for your new line-mates.
