My Dance History: A Comedy of Errors
Let’s be honest, my relationship with dancing is best described as “enthusiastically challenged.” I’m the one at weddings who claps along offbeat and calls it “freestyling.” So, when my friend dared me to learn a TikTok dance, I knew I was in for a wild ride.
Little did I know, this wouldn’t just be any TikTok dance. This was the one, the viral sensation, the one with the catchy song and the moves that seemed physically impossible for someone with my coordination level (which, for the record, is comparable to a newborn giraffe on roller skates).
Armed with my phone, a healthy dose of optimism, and the flexibility of a rusty pipe, I embarked on my dance journey. I hit play on the tutorial and immediately understood I was in over my head.
The steps involved a baffling combination of:
- Hair flips (my hair responded with a resounding “nope”).
- Hip isolations (apparently, my hips move as a unit, like a solid, immovable block).
- A move that can only be described as “casually flinging your limbs in opposite directions.” (I think I pulled a muscle attempting this).
After several hours (yes, hours!), countless repetitions, and a minor existential crisis, I managed to string together a sequence of movements that vaguely resembled the actual dance. It wasn’t pretty, but hey, at least I didn’t break anything.