The Day My Inner Monologue Went Viral (in Real Life)
We all have that voice in our heads, right? The one that narrates life, makes snarky comments, and occasionally plots the downfall of our enemies (or, you know, that person who took the last donut). Mine? Well, let’s just say it’s got the volume cranked up to eleven and zero shame about public appearances.
Take yesterday, for example. I was at the grocery store, minding my own business, perusing the organic kale like the responsible, healthy adult I pretend to be.
When Your Brain Betrays You: The Brenda Chronicles
Now, Brenda isn’t a bad person, per se. But let’s be honest, her fashion choices could be classified as “hazardous to the eyes.” On this particular day, she was rocking a neon pink tracksuit with lime green stripes. It was… a lot.
My inner voice, bless its cotton socks, decided this was the perfect time to pipe up with, “Good heavens, she looks like a highlighter threw up on a jogging suit.”
Here’s the problem: I didn’t just think it. I said it. Out loud. To Brenda’s face.
The look on her face? Priceless. The look on my face? Probably similar to that time I accidentally walked into a glass door.