Confessions of a Recovering Plant Killer (And Why You Should Totally Join My Green Thumb Club)

Confessions of a Recovering Plant Killer (And Why You Should Join the Green Thumb Club)

plant with my lack of green thumb prowess. But something shifted within me during the pandemic-induced sourdough-baking, puzzle-solving frenzy of 2020. Maybe it was the endless hours staring at my bleak, plant-less apartment, or perhaps the universe conspired to turn this plant murderer into a nurturing mother of ferns (still working on that last part). Whatever it was, I decided to adopt (not buy, because commitment issues) a humble little ZZ plant from my local nursery.

plant parenting thing expecting a lot of dead leaves and silent judgment from my new leafy roommate. But guess what? It turns out that keeping tiny humans alive is infinitely harder than tending to a pot of pothos. Who knew?

But beyond the sheer relief of not accidentally killing a living thing, I discovered some unexpected perks of joining the plant parent club:

  1. Instant Zen Master (Almost): There’s something incredibly therapeutic about digging in the soil, watering your plants, and just being present with these silent, non-judgmental beings. It’s like meditation, but with less leg-cramping and more cute terracotta pots.
  2. Boosted Home Décor Game (On a Budget!): Let’s face it, plants are the ultimate home décor hack. They add instant life, color, and personality to any room without breaking the bank. Plus, they make you look way more put-together than you actually are.
  3. Bragging Rights (and the Occasional Humblebrag): Remember those friends who used to judge your plant-killing abilities? Yeah, well, now you get to impress (and maybe even slightly annoy) them with your newfound green thumb. “Oh, this old thing? It’s just my monstera, thriving as usual.” (Insert smug plant parent emoji here).

plant parenthood. There will be struggles. You will overwater. You will underwater. You might even accidentally give your spider plant a sunburn (guilty as charged).

But that’s okay! Because even in those moments of plant-related panic, I’ve learned valuable lessons about patience, observation, and the importance of Googling “why are my plant’s leaves turning yellow?!” at 2 am. Plus, there’s a whole community of plant lovers online who are just as obsessed (and occasionally clueless) as you are. Trust me, solidarity is a beautiful thing, especially when it involves sharing tips on how to revive a droopy peace lily.